So your probably wondering if I'm going to give you the 411 on motherhood...well, yes I'm going to share some of my personal experiences of becoming a mother. When I was pregnant, I was constantly searching for the truth about becoming a new parent and everyone was so damn happy and everything was so amazing. I was looking for the reality of parenthood. Of course, there are happy moments, and amazing experiences with becoming a new parent, but I feel that the perception of parenthood is not balanced. So that's why I'm sharing this post with you.
Honestly, I'm not sure where to start, but I'm going to start with some things that annoy me from time to time. So when I prepare to leave the house which can be running to the store because I forgot to buy eggs in order to make my salmon patties. Note to self: if I don't use an egg they will fall apart...so just go to the store. Well, it's just a quick run right?... but I have to take the baby along. This means I have to make sure his diaper bag has EVERYTHING he needs. Anything can happen when your out and about and babies almost always need something. A quick 10 minute run easily turns into 40 minutes, because Sai is always hungry or is in need a diaper change right before I get ready to leave.
As a mom, you have to think of the worst case scenario. I pack extra items just in case I'm not able to make it home because my car broke down or something crazy happens. All moms need help. It really takes a village to raise a child. I say this because I'm often drained in the mornings, and at the end of the day. Lately, we've been waking up more frequently because he's teething so I have to nurse him back to bed, constantly changing and washing the same items a hundred times because Sai either spit up a big glob of breast milk, urinated out of his diaper while he slept over 4 hours, or my favorite...a poop explosion! Oh and for some reason when he poops he loves to roll over, and sit up and move around a lot. Personally, I don't get it because when he urinates he just sits there calm and I'm like wth? Maybe he thinks if he rolls over the poop will roll off too...I don't know I haven't figured it out yet.
Sai's dad and I are still together, and he's a good father, but men just don't seem to really get what we go thru. If you lived with us you would think Josh delivered the baby, nurses him, and cares for him all day. He sleeps all the time! I'm trying to figure why he's so tired. Josh usually gets Sai for me at the middle of the night because my back is killing me, but he goes right back to sleep. So he's not even up for five whole minutes. This man was knocked out in the hospital after I delivered and nobody could wake him up. How is he retrieving all this sleep? I was losing sleep while I was pregnant, after I delivered, and now caring for the baby. I'm surprised I haven't slipped into some deep insomniac coma.
Fast forward to now, remember I mentioned you have to pack up everything EVERY time you leave with the baby. Sai is 8 months, and when we are preparing to go some where his dad just doesn't get it. He's playing with the baby and none of the bags or items have been packed. I'm still confused and getting irritated as I write this because 8 months enough practice to realize what Sai needs when we plan to hit the road.
Men are just wired different than women. They seriously don't have a clue, but sure do talk the talk, like they do. There's some things that he says we should do regarding the baby and they are the silliest things I have ever heard in my life. If you get pamphlets or a book on how to be a dad, please force your partner to read that because this will cut down on some of the stupidity. I'm in no way saying that I'm a perfect mom, but again mothers think different than fathers do. We are protective and we think about future occurrences in order to prep or prevent them from happening.
I believe that a baby brings family together because it's exciting to add a new edition to the family. Babies truly are a blessing. However, I think sometimes it can be hard on your relationship if you both are not working together. Now I'm not saying because you have a baby your headed for the cliff. I think it's good to know that things change drastically beforehand, so it's good know your with someone who loves you unconditionally, and is willing to be a better person and communicate with you. If you don't have that then...uh I'm not sure what to say here. Josh and I love each other very much, but we have some days where we cannot stand each other which is normal. We both annoy each other and we both like our space so it was new to us to be living together and seeing each other every single day. Funny thing is we both feel sad "sometimes" when we are apart, because parenthood can be lonely when your away from your family. It's important that you both understand this because it's healthy for the mother to have time to herself even for a couple hours is good. So it's important for fathers to realize that and take the wheel sometimes.
If your a new parent or about to be all I can say is be patient with yourself and your partner. Try and discuss things that may be an issue for you. Communication is key. Also, don't ever feel bad to ask for help from your partner because both of you made the baby so it's important for your boyfriend or husband to learn because there will come a day when he will take care of the baby by himself when you have things to do.